7 Irrational Fears All Guys Have in Relationships

Our minds are odd. They have a tendency to self-sabotage, and plant seeds of doubt. They keep us up at night by reminding us of the pressures we face the next day. They introduce unfounded anxieties. So it’s no surprise that guys can have some irrational fears in thier relationship.

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You’re cheating on him and everyone knows it but him and you all laugh about it

What makes this pretty irrational idea such an emotional gut punch isn’t just the idea that you’re cheating on him. It’s the idea that you’re cheating on him and he’s oblivious to it even though it’s so obvious. In his wildest nightmare, you’ve betrayed him and meanwhile, as he walks down the street, people discreetly chortle and whisper offensive names. No one wants to be the guy people discreetly chortle at.

You’re cheating on him and everyone knows it but him and you all laugh about it (via Ex Boyfriend Recovery)

Secretly, you find the sex horrible

Sex is like cooking. Even if you’re terrible at it, people usually don’t have the heart to tell you. They just sort of… put up with it to be nice. What if instead of being great at sex, he’s secretly awful and you and everyone he’s ever slept with have lied to him? This is a great thought for his brain to bring up for consideration just as he’s falling asleep.

Your family hates him

Your friends hate him. Also maybe his friends and family hate him. Why would anyone hang out with someone they hate? Of course this is a wildly unfounded fear. Unless… everyone did it out of pity. Then it would kind of make sense. Not a lot of sense. But enough sense to make him laugh way harder than he needs to at your parent’s jokes to suck up juuuuust a little.

Your family hates him (via New York Post)

As great as your relationship is now, it’ll eventually crash and burn

Out of all these irrational fears, this one is the most theoretically plausible. Of course your relationship will either end very happily or with you two breaking up. But that’s also like thinking your crossing the street ends one of two ways: either you make it to the other side or you get hit by a car. It might be technically correct, but you can’t constantly be thinking of that.

You think he’s a deadbeat

This one could wind up stemming from some very real concerns that he isn’t as successful as he wants to be. If he thinks that, what do YOU think?

What if you murder him?

What if you murder him? (via Fiveprime)

It’s not so much that he’s done anything to warrant being murdered. It’s just that, you know, if you two were sleeping in bed next to each other and you decided to wake up and murder the shit out of him you probably could. He trusts you and that makes him vulnerable.

You are kidnapped

Alternatively, he is kidnapped. How do you even deal with this shit? What does he do? How long is an appropriate wait time before moving on? What if he gets out only to find out you’ve moved on? What if he doesn’t get closure? If he seems distracted on your next vacation abroad — where most kidnappings seem to occur in movies — this is why.

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Everything You Need to Know About the Abortion Pill

The full breakdown on where to get abortion pill, when to take it, and how safe this first-semester abortion procedure is.

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What it is

A medication abortion is not just one “abortion pill,” but a combination of two medications prescribed by a physician that work together to terminate a pregnancy and shed the uterine lining. The two medicines used are mifepristone and misoprostol. Mifepristone, which is taken first, works by blocking progesterone — a hormone necessary to sustain pregnancy — and causing the embryo to detach from the uterine wall. Misoprostol is taken within a day or two after taking the first pill, usually at home, and works by causing cramping that empties the uterus, kind of like a period.

According to stats from Planned Parenthood, a medication abortion is 98 percent effective up to eight weeks into a pregnancy. From 8-9 weeks, it’s about 96 percent effective, and then 93 percent effective from 9-10 weeks.

Abortion Pills (via Toronto Star)

Who can use it

Medication abortion is a safe (and common) procedure for terminating first-trimester pregnancies. In 2016, the FDA extended the window of approval for medication abortions from seven weeks to 10 weeks, or about two months after the first day of your last period. After 10 weeks (or on day 71 after the first day of your last period), you can opt to have an in-clinic abortion. People under 18 are able to have medication abortions, though most states require some sort of parental consent (in some cases, you need consent from two parents).

What to expect

Your physician will give you a pregnancy test and, in some states, perform a mandatory ultrasound to determine how far along you are. You’ll get written instructions from your physician on how to take the pills. Most people don’t experience any side effects after taking the first pill, mifepristone, but it’s not unusual to feel nauseous or start bleeding. Because its job is to cause the uterine lining to shed, misoprostol should cause a lot of bleeding and cramping within one to four hours of taking the first dose. Some people say this cramping feels “like normal period cramps” and don’t experience intense bleeding, but you may feel nauseous and experience intense cramping and heavy bleeding (think, soaking through a maxi pad).

Everything You Need to Know About the Abortion Pill (via blogger)

It’s not abnormal to see large clumps of tissue or blood clots after taking the misoprostol. The bleeding should start to subside after a few hours, usually around four to five, but can take longer. Cramping will continue for a day or two and decrease in intensity with time. If you’re feeling pain or nausea, your doctor can prescribe an anti-nausea medication and you can take ibuprofen — just don’t take aspirin, which is a blood thinner and can cause more bleeding.

Bleeding and spotting might continue for two to three weeks after the abortion. Your doctor will have you come back in for a follow up, where you’ll get a blood test and possibly another ultrasound to make sure the abortion was complete and you’re healthy.

What the side effects are

Other side effects include nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, fatigue, and a mild fever (via www.self.com)

Most people compare medication abortion to the feeling of an early miscarriage — so the primary physical effects are bleeding and cramping. But other side effects include nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, fatigue, and a mild fever up to about 100 degrees. If you have a fever higher than that, or the day after you take the misoprostol, you should call your doctor immediately. The risk of infection with a medication abortion is very low but not totally impossible. You doctor can prescribe antibiotics if you have an infection.

How safe it is

An oft-cited Princeton study from 2012 found that less than 1 percent of people who got medication abortions at Planned Parenthood from 2009-2010 had a serious side effect or incomplete abortion. The most common adverse outcome is that the abortion is incomplete, and patients can then decide between taking more medication or having an in-clinic abortion.

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5 Tips for Having Sex at Your Parents’ House

For most people, the holiday season consists of a lot of traveling to visit family. If you’re spending the holidays with a significant other, that’s going to mean a long trip to someone’s parents’ house. You’ll probably stay overnight, probably in a twin bed or on a futon and, for a variety of reasons that you’ll regret after your parents give you a shameful look the next morning, you’ll probably try to have sex. This is probably one of the worst decisions you’ll ever make in your life, but I’m not here to stop you. Instead, here’s how to do it right:

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Embrace the situation

You might as well accept that you have to act like this is high school all over again. Hell, try forcing yourselves to stay quiet. You’d be surprised how fun that can be.

You might as well accept that you have to act like this is high school all over again (via The Spruce)

Switch it up

The best way to have sex within earshot of your parents is to not have sex within earshot of your parents, you weirdos. Sneak out and try to have sex in your car, or the bushes, or your neighbor’s attic. The adrenaline rush (especially in the last example) can definitely increase your libido.

Have sex on the floor

This might be surprising, but your old twin bed is really loud and uncomfortable. Throw a few blankets and pillows on the ground. This way, you’re not straining your childhood bedframe and sending awkward, constant squeaks throughout the house with each thrust.

Turn the TV on or something, anything

Remember to turn the TV on or something, anything (via Shape Magazine)

This one should be the most obvious. No one wants their family members hearing them have sex, unless they’re a crazy person. Hopefully you have a TV or radio or something you can crank up to hide the beautiful and awkward sounds of your lovemaking. PRO TIP: Don’t crank it up so loud that it’s obvious you’re doing weird things in your childhood bed; you want it just slightly louder than normal volume.

BONUS TIP: You can still fly solo

Just because you’re by yourself this holiday, doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to rub one out before the yuletide. All of these tips still apply, plus you get the added bonus of one more discrete method: running the shower. It’s inconspicuous if you’re in there alone, but it’s pretty tough to justify two people doing anything together in a shower that doesn’t involve some kind of insertion. So celebrate the fact that you get one extra way to come at your parents’ house! Nothing about that sentence is depressing at all!

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