6 reasons why you haven’t found your true love

We all look for that perfect someone to share our life with. A person who loves us unconditionally, understands us like no one else and stands beside us through thick and thin. But in case you have not found your significant other yet, do not lose heart and blame it on destiny. There might be chances that your approach towards finding love is wrong, or you are unintentionally pushing it away. Here are a few possible reasons why you are struggling to find an ideal partner…

>>7 questions to ask your partner to help build a stronger relationship

Your expectation level

You need to understand that no relationship is self-sustaining, and it requires continuous efforts from both the partners to make it successful. Do not expect your partner or your relationship to be ‘perfect’ from the very first day. Instead, both of you need to work (and it’s not easy!) on it to make it perfect.

Your expectation level (via New HD Wallpapers)

You haven’t moved on from your past

If you are nursing a broken heart, it is obvious that you will not be able to invest emotionally in any other relationship. Take your time to address your feelings and get rid of all the emotional baggage from the past. It would help you to realise what you are exactly seeking from a relationship.

​Someone who’s already taken

Many people unknowingly make this mistake and end up hurting their own emotions. There is no point in waiting for someone who’s already in a serious relationship. Do we really need to explain why? There’s a reason why that person is in a ‘committed’ relationship. Do not live in an Utopian world where that person will be your soulmate someday (which might NEVER arrive) in life. Instead, understand that life is full of endless possibilities and there’s someone else who’s meant for you.

​Someone who’s already taken (via Dr. Alexandra Solomon)

​You have commitment issues

Does the idea of a commitment gives you jitters? Do you feel that being committed to one person for a lifetime can be suffocating? Or, you find it difficult to trust someone? Maybe, you are unsure about what you exactly want. It’s time to halt your search and focus on yourself and address those issues which you need to work on first before you start looking for a soulmate again.

​You have other priorities

Maybe love is not on your priority list right now. You are already occupied with your career or busy travelling to the places that have made it to your bucket list. As far as you are happy with what you are doing, it’s okay if finding ‘true love’ is not one of your goals in life right now.

Love is not on your priority list right now (via New Scientist)

​The ups and downs of a relationship

It’s easy to be in love when everything is fine. But you only get to test the foundation of your relationship when it goes through a rough patch. Maybe, you give up easily once your relationship has crossed its ‘rosy’ period and start looking for greener pastures. But in reality, love is about being together no matter what challenges life throws at you and your partner.

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7 questions to ask your partner to help build a stronger relationship

A little concern goes a long way to keep your relationship healthy and happy with your partner. When was the last time you asked your partner if he or she is comfortable with you? Don’t worry, we can understand and that is why we bring to you seven questions that you can ask your partner to make your relationship deeper and stronger…

>>7 signs you are ready to get married

​What can I do to make you feel comfortable or loved?

Many couples start treading the wrong path by assuming things. It’s always better to ask if your partner feels the need to tweak some of your habits or introduce something new into the relationship. Maybe they want you to hug them before you step out for office, or perhaps they would like to spend some me-time every day. Talk it out and make sure you both are on the same page.

​What can I do to make you feel comfortable or loved? (via Br-art)

​How can I be a good support system?

This question might seem frivolous at first, but it may lead to some honest conversation with your partner. Ask them where you can support them better and make things a little easier for them. Your partner might simply ask you to chip in some help in household chores. Trust us, the conversation would be worth it.

​Is there something from the past that is bothering you?

Holding grudges about anything from the past will weaken your relationship stronger. Rather than sweeping things under the rug, ask your partner to share if there is something that is bothering him/her and try to sort the issue immediately.

​Is there something from the past that is bothering you? (via The Cheat Sheet)

​What can I say or do for you when you return from office?

Your partner is going to melt (not literally, of course) if you ask this question. They might want as little communication as possible once they enter home, or would like to be kissed and cuddled. It just takes a question to understand them better!

​Do you want me to touch like this?

Whether it’s playing with his/her hair, holding hands or wrapping your partner in your arms—ask what makes him/her feel loved and special. We are sure you will get a good hint and don’t forget to include it in your daily schedule.

Do you want me to touch like this? (via Glamour)

​Are you happy with our sex life?

Do we need to emphasise why this question is important? Ask them what they enjoy the most and where you can turn things steamier. An honest conversation on this topic will surely improve their level of sexual satisfaction.

​Are you stressed?

Ask your partner what are the main stress factors how you can help solve these. This will help you to get a sneak peek of what is going on in your partner’s head and how are he/she is struggling with it.

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How porn ruined the first sex experience

If you have an active sex life, you will surely admit that things you see in porn leads to unrealistic expectations. Sex life, as shown in porn movies, might not be as sensual and easy-going as depicted. Unfortunately, people, especially the inexperienced ones, fall for these illusions. We asked couples how porn might have taught them the wrong lessons, and surprisingly most of them agreed that it not only gave them unrealistic expectations, but also ruined their first sex experience. Here’s what they had to say…

>>Some things you need to know about “hate sex”

​Women always orgasm

“What porn films do not show is that female orgasm is very complicated to achieve. It might take a few seconds for the women to masturbate in the porn clip, but the reality is completely different. Achieving the big-O requires a lot of patience and can take quite some time. In fact, it might not even happen every single time. I was really surprised when I saw that my girlfriend did not have an orgasm when we had sex for the first time”.

​Women always orgasm (via The Independent)

​Ejaculating on her body

“I will have a big argument with my partner if he comes on my body. But porn always shows a woman willingly accepting the man ejaculating on her, which is ridiculous. Unfortunately, that’s what my boyfriend did when we had sex for the first time because he thought that it will excite me to no end. Thanks to all the porn clips he had watched, it totally ruined my experience!”

​People have perfect bodies

“Porn actors always have the perfect bodies – think well-endowed penis, six-pack abs, rounded buttocks and ample bosom. In reality, people might have bulging tummies, uneven boobs and even a small penis, and it is completely normal. Imagine my horror when I saw my boyfriend’s penis for the first time and ended up comparing it with what I had seen in porn movies!”

​People have perfect bodies (via Maxim)

​Foreplay matters

Porn films hardly show any foreplay, nor do they show usage of any lube. They set the wrong expectation that you don’t need any lubrication, be it natural or store bought, before penetrative sex. Trust me, I learnt the importance of lubrication after I had a bad first-time experience”

​Moaning loudly is a must

“If a girl is not moaning loudly, that does not mean she is not enjoying the deed. Not everyone likes to make noises or shout erotic words.”

​Moaning loudly is a must (via Huffington Post)

​When it comes to pubic hair

“It is kind of sexist to see that females in porn movies are always shaved down there, and men are not. Every woman has pubic hair and it is her personal choice whether she wants to shave it or not. Same applies to men as well. I was really upset when my boyfriend cringed after seeing my unshaved private parts.”

​Sex positions are not that easy

“People in porn movies pull off complicated sex positions effortlessly. And surprisingly, many of them are not even possible in real life. I could not even pull off a doggie when I tried having sex for the first time.”

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7 signs you are ready to get married

Marriage is one of the most important decisions and you must only settle down when you are sure about it. Here are seven signs that indicate you are ready to get married.

>>6 experiences you should have with your boyfriend before getting married

​You have found the one

You are dating someone and see him or her as your life partner. You are sure that you are in love, and there is not even a hint of infatuation.You understand them well, and are confident about your choice.

​You know why you want to get married

​You know why you want to get married (via Thought Catalog)

You are getting married because you know it is the right time and with the right person. You are not giving in to any kind or peer or parental pressure. Plus, you are not fascinated by the idea of a lavish wedding, honeymoon, pre-wedding shoot, trousseau, et al.

​You are financially independent

You are professionally successful, and are financially independent. No matter how much your partner earns, you are capable enough to manage your own finances. You know about all your investments, accounts, loans and see yourself financially secure. In fact, if the need arises, you can be the bread winner of the family.

​Address your emotions

​Address your emotions (via Positively Smitten Magazine)

You are not carrying any emotional baggage from your past relationships, nor are you confused about your feelings for your present partner. Moreover, you both are on the same page emotionally. You partner loves you as well, and wants to see a future with you. You both are not keeping any secrets from each other, and are willing to make a new beginning.

Your family and friends like your partner

Sometimes, people tend to overlook the flaws in their partner when they are in love. However, it is important to consider how your family and friends feel about your relationship with your partner. Your near and dear ones are your support system, and you have surely made a great choice if they are fond of your partner as well.

​You are ready for more responsibilities

​You are ready for more responsibilities (via Rocket Lawyer)

You consider yourself mature and are willing to handle the responsibilities once you get married. You understand that you will have to look after your new family, and your decisions will not only impact you but will influence your partner’s life as well. It’s not about just decisions, but every move you make will be important or detrimental for the entire family. You will have to think twice before finalising those instant travel plans, night outs with besties, shopping sprees and even professional decisions.

​You are confident about it

You are sure that you have done all that you wanted to do before getting married (think solo trip to Europe, bachelorette party and spending time with your parents) and have lived your life to the fullest. You have met (or dated) enough people before deciding to settle down with your partner.

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Some things you need to know about “hate sex”

If you have never heard the term ‘hate sex’, this story is going to an eye-opener. For starters, as the name suggests, hate sex is about having intercourse with someone you don’t like. There’s someone you simply hate and can’t stand. But instead of venting it out verbally, or keeping all your feelings inside, you have an intense sex session (with mutual consent, of course) with them. Since it involves feelings like frustration, disgust and animosity, the session turns out to be pretty rough. And you might just end up having the most ah-mazing sex of your life. Sounds interesting, eh? Read on to know more about hate sex.

>>Here’s reason why December is the best month to have sex

​Say goodbye to frustration?

According to people, hate sex is a great way to get rid of all the angst and frustration you hold for a person. Imagine being passionate, high on energy and emotions on bed for someone you absolutely hate? The sex session is bound to be a steamy yet different experience. It might even mellow down your hatred towards each other. And who knows, the sight of that person may not irritate you that much after the deed.

​Say goodbye to frustration? (via The Brunette Diaries)

​But it might not lead to the solutions you are seeking

No matter how calm people might feel after having hate sex, it cannot resolve any issues. Nothing can replace an open discussion about the problem where you can pour your heart out and find amicable solutions. Hate sex might be a temporary fix but one does not get anything constructive (we are talking about solutions!) out of it.

​Should you do it with your ex?

If you think having hate-sex with your ex-partner will revive your relationship or make him or her forgive you for your mistakes, then you are wrong. It is not a magical wand that will erase all the issues that led to the break-up, right? Hate sex may give a passionate night but not a passionate relationship.

​Should you do it with your ex? (via calgary marriage counselling & mental health services)

​You may feel guilty

If you think there is a slightest chance of feeling embarrassed or guilty after having hate sex, you should back off immediately. You should feel physically satisfied and emotionally drained of all negative feelings after indulging in hate sex. Remember, having sex with a person you dislike should not make you feel bogged down and question your own ethics or morals.

​Set your boundaries

Hate-sex can sometimes get rough. Ensure that your partner is comfortable with that. It is advisable to have a little chat with your partner about their limits. No matter how crazy the situation gets, do not overstep your boundaries. Lastly, using a protection is a must. We don’t need to emphasise on this point more.

​Set your boundaries (via LunchClick)

​Keep this in mind

Before you think of engaging in an intense and wild hate sex session, make sure that you and your partner have a clear understanding about what you are getting into. Sometimes, sex leads to some unexpected feelings, and it might even complicate your relationship. Hence, be clear about the rules of this game and don’t set any wrong expectations. Plus, the deed might lead to satisfaction on physical level but don’t expect anything more out of it.

​Let there be no negativity

The idea of hate sex is to release those negative emotions and vent off all the frustration. But do not forget that it does not mean hatred is good. Don’t think that having hard feelings for someone can always be healed (or rewarded) through sex. In fact, holding any kind of grudges is not the best thing for a relationship.

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6 experiences you should have with your boyfriend before getting married

In case you are planning to tie the knot with your boyfriend, we have compiled a list of experiences you must have with him before taking this plunge. Hope, these would help you get a fair idea of what it would be like to share a roof with him for the rest of your life.

>>7 ways to take your relationship to the next level in 2018

Have a BIG argument

It might sound frivolous but it is really important to have a big argument with your partner once in a while. This surely is not a pleasant experience; it will not only help you sort out your differences but will also prove how strong is the foundation of your relationship. If your partner loses his temper quickly or tries to run away from the situation, marrying him might not be the best option for you. But if you manage to work out a solution together, you are all set to take your relationship to the next level.

Have a big argument (via Mike and Susan Dawson)

​Travel together

You might have gone on weekend trips together but going on a longer vacation will help you understand your companion better. It is a great way to test your compatibility with him, and know each other better. In fact, you will get a better idea of how your partner reacts when he steps out of his comfort zone, and how you take decisions together in a completely new environment.

Share responsibilities

We are sure you do not want to marry an irresponsible guy, right? Whether it’s growing a kitchen garden, taking care of a pet or an ailing family member, try sharing a few responsibilities together before tying the knot. You would understand how he handles the situation when it comes to sharing responsibilities.

Share responsibilities (via US News Money)

​What about experiencing financial stress?

According to experts, a lot of newly-wed couples struggle to overcome the hurdle posed by financial issues. It will be a good idea to spend a month together where you both pool your finances. See how you plan your expenditure together, pay bills and manage the other finance-related stuff. It can be a challenging task, but it would be worth your effort. You will also get a fair idea of each other’s spending habits and the areas you both need to work on.

​Live together

It may not be possible in every case (that’s why we have suggested to travel together), but living together before getting married can be an eye-opener. You will get to understand him better, and see how you support each other in rough situations. If everything goes well, it’s the time to decide the day and venue of your D-day!

Live together (via Active.com)

​Discover a hobby together

Instead of going on lunch or movie dates, spend time in a hobby class together. Yes, you read it right. Pick a hobby or activity that you both have not tried before and you might end up exploring a completely new side of your future spouse. You will see how he interacts with others and responds to a new situation. If he bears a I-know-it-all attitude or is reluctant to accepting changes, you might have to deal with a stubborn spouse after marriage.

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Here’s reason why December is the best month to have sex

There is something intoxicatingly romantic about December. The festivities, the weather and the general bonhomie surrounding the last month of the year make us do things, which perhaps were kept pending throughout the year.

The blooming November winter grows intense with each passing day in December. We want to stay a little longer in the warm bed paying a deaf ear to the incessant requests of the alarm clock to start the day. The magic in the air makes us hold our partners a little tighter in a cozy hug as we bid them goodbye, but not before planting a kiss and making a promise to return home early from office. Naughty glances are exchanged with promises of a hot night defying the numbing weather.

Among all things, having sex with your partner, which is always a pleasurable experience, can become more passionate. Thanks to the weather and the festivities that December brings!

>>Some sex secrets women want men to know

​The festive season

Celebration is another name for sex, isn’t it? (via Napa Valley Register)

It’s time to let the colour of Christmas (red) melt the blues of the year. Also, the New Year is just a month or a day away. It’s time to complete the promises we made, to heal the wounds we gave. Celebration is another name for sex, isn’t it? And what could be a better way to pay tribute to December than making tender love to your partner?

​Because the weather is meant for…

Soaking up the warmth of a fireplace, as you snuggle with your partner, and never worry about what lies ahead is only possible in December. Let the amber of the fire melt all your worries and bring you closer. Do we really need to elaborate what will happen next?

​The last month

December is the best month to have sex (via Greatist)

Who would not like to make the most out of the last month. It’s time to meet your friends, mend broken ties and do things which have remain unaccomplished throughout the year. As the curtains draw on the year, the tendency to make your love making sessions steamier grows with every passing day.

​Vacation sex

Everyone goes on a vacation in December (expect the poor souls who sit behind their desks and spend the festive season writing stories about how to have an enjoyable time!). Exotic location and good food coupled with great weather make it a perfect recipe for a hot session in the bed later. Interestingly, people tend to have more sex when they are on a vacation (we really don’t need a research to prove this, do we?).

​Aphrodisiacal food

We tend to eat more aphrodisiacal food during winters (via Save the Carrot)

Believe it or not, we tend to eat more aphrodisiacal food during winters, even without realising what they are capable of doing. For instance, chocolate is a great aphrodisiac, and no Christmas or New Year celebration is complete without a rich and sinful chocolate cake. Mostly, all the foods that are meant to keep us warm also have aphrodisiacal properties, for example, spicy food (chilli is one of the culprits here), red meat etc. But who is complaining when you can have so much fun (and sex) after eating such good stuff.

​Best time to complete your relationship goals!

Let’s take you back to the beginning of the year when you frantically make New Year resolutions, which sadly are never meant to be completed. Somewhere in that long list, a few might have penned down their relationship goals for the year. This is the month, the last month, to complete those. What are you waiting for, stop reading this and go grab some condoms (don’t forget a tube of lube!)

Happy December!

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7 ways to take your relationship to the next level in 2018

We all have relationship goals and with the New Year just around the corner, it’s the perfect time to set some goals to take your relationship to the next level in 2018. However, it is easier said than done. In case, your relationship had faced some rough weather this year, it’s time to heal the wounds and look forward to a better and brighter tomorrow. Here are a few things to keep in mind to help you take your relationship to the next level:

>>Here’s why sometimes a woman breaks up with you even when she’s in love!

​Reveal your future plans

If you are already in a stable relationship and are playing with the idea of getting married, it’s time to reveal your plans. And if you are already married and want to have a family, won’t it be a good idea to let your partner know? No matter at what stage of a relationship you are in, there is always a future that looms ahead. So, plan accordingly with your partner.

​Reveal your future plans (via SLR Lounge)

​Let bygones be bygones

This is for those couples who have gone through a turbulent time in the recent past. ‘Forget and forgive’ should be your motto because nothing is as good as starting a New Year with a clean slate. Let your partner know if you want to reconcile and rekindle the relationship.

​Make travel plans together

The hectic schedules we maintain can have an adverse effect on our relationship. Take short breaks and spend time with your partner. Even planning a holiday right at the beginning of the year can be an exciting experience. Travel brings people closer. It not only helps you relax but provides you the perfect opportunity to shower your partner with love and pay undivided attention.

​Make travel plans together (via Couples Resorts)

​Have more family get togethers

Family plays an important part in our life. While we keep in constant touch with our parents and close relatives, it is a good practice to do the same with your partner’s family. And it can be a great gesture to show that you are serious about taking your relationship to the next level because by doing so you aren’t confining the relationship to just two people. You are also making an effort to bring two families together.

​Experiment with new ideas

If you are already in a passionate relationship and share some good physical chemistry, it’s time to experiment with new ideas. You can try out new sex positions you had never experimented with before. If you are yet to share an intimate moment with your partner and both of you are comfortable with each other, you can plan a romantic night out and let things take its own course.

​Share your secret desires

​Share your secret desires (via Carmencitta)

We can share our secrets with only a handful of people we are comfortable with. Sharing secrets or your fondest memories with your partner will not only bring you closer but it is also an indication that you are serious about the relationship and want to take it to the next level.

​Be transparent

Transparency in any relationship, be it romantic or otherwise, helps strengthen the ties between two people. We have already mentioned in one of the points about the importance of starting a relationship on a good note if things weren’t running smooth earlier. However, let your partner know if differences cannot be ironed out. If things are not working out, do not let a relationship end on a bad note. You can take the relationship to a next level by bringing it to an amicable end rather than continue being in a relationship gone sour.

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7 lesser-known sex lessons you can learn from Kamasutra

Sex is perhaps the first word that comes to your mind when someone mentions Kamasutra. But did you know that Kamasutra emphasised on women sex education? Will you be surprised if we inform you that Kamasutra instructed women to climax first? Yes, the masterpiece is more than just a manual on sex positions. We bring to you seven lessons from Kamasutra that will change your perception about sex and you would look at love making differently:

>>Tips for boosting confidence in the bedroom

​Size of your penis determines if you are a bull or a hare

Yes, you heard it right, size does matter. According to Kamasutra, you could be a raging bull, an energetic horse or a timid hare as per the size of your penis. However, this classification can help a man and a woman enjoy a great sexual experience by finding compatible partners based on the size of their sexual organsm.

​Size of your penis determines if you are a bull or a hare (via The Penis Enlargement)

​Be a kiss-plorer

There is a difference between kissing and kissing the right way. Confused? Let Kamasutra teach you the three ways of kissing women – the brushing kiss, the throbbing kiss and the measured kiss,. The book says that you should not restrict your kisses to her lips only. Explore and do not hesitate to kiss the hair, chest, forehead, breasts, mouth, clitoris and the inside of the mouth.

​Ladies first, please

The book not only recommends that a woman should climax first, but it also suggests different ways to give your woman multiple orgasms. It further explains that a woman should continue to pleasure her man even after getting an orgasm because, unlike a man, a woman can still be active after a climax.

​Let the woman learn about sex (via The Cheat Sheet)

​Let the woman learn about sex

Kamasutra says that a woman should read the book before marriage so that she could manage her life with her husband without any hiccups. Knowledge of the book will add to her allure which will make her feel more desirable.

​The art of wooing and approaching a woman

Kamasutra is not about just sex positions – the book has some detailed knowledge on how to talk and woo a woman. This is an art which is very difficult to master. But thankfully, you can start the right conversation with the help of Kamasutra. Tip from Kamasutra: A man can start with touching the shoulder of a woman to express desire. Wait and watch is she reciprocates.

​The pleasure of scratching your man

​The pleasure of scratching your man (via Crowne Plaza Niagara Falls Fallsview)

This is strictly for women. Kamasutra suggests eight varieties of scratch–circle, line, tiger’s claw, discus, half-moon, hare’s leap, lotus leap and peacock’s foot. Scratching your partner’s back or his thighs during the act intensifies passion. The man can reciprocate by biting the woman during moments of extreme pleasure.

​Healthy life for great sex

The book emphasises on leading a healthy life because satisfying sexual relationship is not possible without it. Kamasutra also suggests that a man must shave not only his face but also other parts of his body to maintain good personal hygiene. It further advocates hygiene and cleanliness in daily life and surroundings—how couples should live in a well-ventilated house with ample sunlight, take baths regularly and brush their teeth.

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Some sex secrets women want men to know

Seven sex secrets women wish their partner knew…

>>Why you should wait for marriage to have sex?

A good talk is a great aphrodisiac

Many women find a good conversation to be a great turn-on. For them, talking and feeling loved are very important. Good conversation during walks or while the couple is relaxing can be prove to be a great aphrodisiac. A man could tell his woman how much he loves her, which acts as a reassurance that he is with her mentally during those intimate moments.

Women want to be praised

Women want to be praised (via Men’s Fitness)

For a couple that has been together for long, sometimes it is natural that women may feel that their partner may find them less alluring. Because of this some women undress only under the cover of darkness. Caring men can sense such anxieties. There is no need to lie and say she’s gorgeous if she isn’t, nor is there a need to say that she is not attractive anymore. One can always appreciate and praise what you do find attractive.

For a woman sex isn’t separate from rest of her life

On the other hand, men tend to compartmentalise, feeling that stressful aspects of life can be parked mentally and separated from sexual activity. Women need good feelings and experiences during the day to have satisfying sex. How her lover treats her out of bed, greatly influences her response in bed. Inattentiveness, harsh language, rude tones, hurtful words, and criticism can make it difficult for a woman to get involved, feel enthusiastic and be passionate during sex.

An orgasm is not a necessity

An orgasm is not a necessity (via Reader’s Digest)

Many men feel that a good lover is one who can bring his woman to climactic sexual culmination. It is great to have such moments, but aren’t always essential. Many women feel pressure from partners and even from themselves to reach an orgasm. Sometimes instead of having orgasms, women prefer to engage in just foreplay.

Sex need not be a serious act

Playfulness is a great quality. Many men are far too serious about sex. They forget to laugh, be romantically mischievous, have fun. Playfulness and light-heartedness can make intimate moments enjoyable and relaxing. This takes performance pressure off from both partners.

Women cherish non-sexual touching and tenderness

Women cherish non-sexual touching and tenderness (via Playbuzz)

Women love romance, cuddling, hand-holding and kissing. But many women complain that their men never do this except during foreplay. A woman should make her man realise the joy of touching. As you give him a relaxing massage and stroke his face and hair tenderly, he starts experiencing the joy of this kind of non-sexual touching. Tell your man what makes you feel loved and wanted.

Warm attention after sex is important

A woman’s need for tender moments goes beyond the actual lovemaking. Some women complain that men fall asleep immediately after the act. It is true that when a man is having sex, his endorphin level is very high. Almost immediately after ejaculation, he goes through a refractory phase where he loses his erection and all his systems gear down. In females this phase happens gradually. However, if you don’t like him falling asleep immediately, tell him without putting him down. Alternatively, let him sleep in your arms for a few minutes and gently wake him up afterwards.

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